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Archive for January, 2011

Networking and introverts are two words that would not usually be thought of as going together but that’s not necessarily true. There are ways we introverts can survive networking to further careers. Networking is a requirement in many fields such as sales, and desirable in others. Introverts can network too but in a different way. Here are a few tips to survive networking.
1. Don’t apologize for being an introvert or feel badly for being one. I have experienced shaming by numerous extraverted individuals who are ignorant of what introversion is and completely disinterested in learning anything about it. They believe the world centres around the extrovert and anyone who is not a ‘people’ person is ‘flawed’ and should take a back seat to them. Not all extroverts are ignorant though:)
2. Understand that we (introverts) can adapt our style when necessary. It’s important to remain genuine when we adapt our style, though. There will always be aspects of our work that we don’t like and it’s important that we learn how to do them effectively. Adapting my style to some other style that’s foreign to me will be the most challenging!
3. Play to your style. Arrange for smaller groups and more intimate settings whenever possible. It’s much easier for introverts to meet an individual over coffee or in a setting with small groups.
4. Evaluate and address fears that prevent networking. This is a big one for me! Consider the fear of rejection to not knowing what to say to not wanting to impose. Uncovering and addressing these factors so they don’t present barriers to present and future networking opportunities. Wouldn’t have thought of doing this.
5. Manage the ‘head game’ of ‘no one will want to listen to you’. So this is something other people experience? Not just me? Very good information to have, vital even. Turn this ‘fear’ into the fact that introverts are very good listeners and let others talk, as people in general feel good when they talk about themselves.
6. Learn some conversation starters.
7. Start networking with people you know. It is more comfortable to network when looking at familiar faces and the fear of rejection is lessened.
8. Practice!!
Am sure these tips will be a challenge to implement for many introverts including myself!

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Icy Blast

Thirty three below zero with windchill
freezes exposed flesh so very quickly
scarves wrapped round and round make winter mummies
covered head to toe against bitter cold.

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After the storm

mounds of snow piled high
sun and clouds alternated
snow squalls persisted!

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The topic of today’s blog was supposed to be videos about and by introverts…that didn’t quite work out so it has been postponed until later.
A search found three articles on introversion that I’d not seen before. One is a guide for introverts who blog:
http://www.blogherald.com/2007/01/27/a-guide-for-the-introverted-blogger/ Blogging isn’t proving to be too much of a challenge, as I’m here writing anonymously on the web, can take my time putting thoughts together and am not overly concerned if anyone criticizes or doesn’t like the content. Not everyone will like it and that’s fine.
Further searching found an article on Instant Messaging for introverts. I do IM and have been doing so for a number of months now, however, every so often have to take a break from it, usually several days in length. Didn’t occur to me that this is the equivalent to chatting in person as writing is involved. IM is a very social activity and it does drain me! Immediate responses are a must and introverts like me don’t do that well. Takes me awhile to fall asleep at night after chatting on IM just like it does after spending extended amounts of time in social situations. So will cut back the amount of time spent on IM…spend more quiet time:). The article referred to at the beginning of this paragraph was an eye-opener for me regarding IM. The author of this article also writes that while IM is draining, e-mails are perfect. There is no need to answer immediately and can take time composing a well-thought out reply. This writer also comments on what it is like to be introverted in the workplace. Discusses multi-tasking as a not-so-introvert friendly way of working and mentions he is often distracted from the task at hand. Both of these I really relate to! I do better focusing on one thing at a time, with minimal distraction.
http://www.tidbits.com/article/9544
The third article I found is actually an interview with Jonathan Rauch in the “Atlantic”, based on the response to an article in the same magazine on the trials of living introverted in an extroverted world,printed some time earlier. This interview is fabulous! Introverts are misunderstood, for the most part, by extroverts who simply do not remotely comprehend us. In the extroverted world there is seemingly constant socializing, partying and easy shooting of the breeze, none of which we introverts do at all well. Instead, we are looked upon as loners, antisocial, socially inept, and lacking personality. We’re none of those, we just choose to reveal ourselves to fewer people, more slowly and socialize with fewer people less often.
The extrovert’s chattiness is seen as the key to social success and happiness and Jonathan Rauch remarks that it’s harder for girls/women if they aren’t inclined to chat. It is wrongly assumed by the extroverted majority that introverts cannot possibly be happy or socially ‘successful’ because we aren’t chatters. From all that I hear daily in the way of ‘constant chitchat’, the vast majority isn’t worth listening to. What extroverts do well is keep a conversation going even though what is being said isn’t particularly profound or interesting. Nor is it intended to necessarily convey information or ‘mean’ things. Introverts just don’t do this well: we don’t think fast enough and end up frequently saying something stupid. We require time to consider carefully what is being said, analyze then form our responses. Introverts can and do talk at length if the subject is something of interest and it involves learning, teaching, or analyzing.
What we introverts want is respect …to be who we are socially and not be dismissed by extroverts.
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2006/02/introverts-of-the-world-unite/4646/1/
Next time, a bit on the inuitive part of being an introvert and INFJ, which I am.

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